POLITICAL PROSTITUTION

Despite all the bullshit about 'small business is the engine room of our economy' the big banks, supermarkets and oil companies continue to dominate the decisions of our government. Even Golden Showers Shire has its share of self-interested bureaucrats who just want to please the Chardoney-end of Bannockburn and not the normal powerless residents of its smaller villages.

The supposed advantages of mega-mergers that have taken place over the last thirty years in drug companies, airlines, banking conglomerates and mining magnates have supposed to have been to make the economy and the country more robust, save money and bring down prices. Rather than see to it that Australia looks after its own economy our companies, more than likely owned by overseas concerns want to take on the world with the crazy belief that they are God's gift to the world and our 25 million can compete toe-to-toe with the other 5 billion pairs of feet on our planet (apologies to any one-footed residents).

The reality is we end up with near monopoly power by a few companies willing to spread their money into other peoples businesses and exert pressure on our governments any which way they can.

Alphabet is one such company only intent on controlling our every move to their profitable advantage.

Take the spurious example of the CSG miners warning that Australia is likely to run out of gas in the next twenty years but failing to mention that we are selling it overseas in quantities that in one year we sell about ten years supply of our own consumption, and might we add, at prices that we could only dream about.

I don't see the point of our politicians saying the country is not cost-effective (the constant blame on wages and not on compliance costs) or efficient enough to make our own stuff at competitive prices when they could halve the cost of energy tomorrow and allow our home-grown businesses to succeed.

Big chains beat out string every time. The large companies don't need to be competitive they just buy out the competition and maintain prices they want. I know of no example where prices have gone down because a company has merged and become more efficient. We'll keep the analogies coming by saying that the big fish are constantly gnawing on the vitals of the smaller fish all the way down the food chain.

The bigger is better complex does not hold true either, Dunbar numbers disprove that theory, and companies these days certainly don't put the welfare of their customers first. More and more the corporate circus calls out to us 'come in suckers!'.

Unless governments put in place protections for the electors, the spate of naughty banks and finance companies, insurance, aged care and the death industry will continue to run amok with millions in customers funds when financial protections for the customer are removed in return for big political donations, Deregulation actually promotes efficiency and competition is a myth that our politicians fall for every time an industry wants to increase its power and profits.

Bigger business doesn't always provide bigger returns for the owners either, as Board members and CEO's share management fees in the millions every time they make a decision to spend our money. Selling off your own arse in big business is more common than rent boys along 'the Wall'. (Sydney joke)

EACH ACCORDING TO THEIR OWN

One of the most disturbing thing about political correctness and gender equality is the fact it is sometimes confusing when to use it and how to define or recognise it. When does one use plain courtesy and do others know what the hell your doing and why?

As an instance I was at the bank the other day and I opened the door for a lady and was still there five customers later feeling like both a doorman and a dork and not a word of thanks or even recognition. Next time a girl with firetruck red hair walks up to a door she can fucking open it herself.

Gone are the days when a man opened the door for a woman, took her coat, held her chair, directed her to go first and walked on the traffic side of a footpath. Yes, maybe we could drop tipping the hat or not swearing in front of them as hats are rare and women are the worst swearers.

I believe that everyone should treat each other according to their generation, or as the evangelists would say, each to their own kind. If your an old male chauvinist like myself you instinctively treat women as the weaker sex, if your young and virile then treat women as your equal. Can we be any fairer to all genders? So if your a young person or trying to be one with Botox and Boobs then maybe one should learn the old habits and respond accordingly and If your an old person then treat young people as they would treat you and just tell them to fuck off.

In regard to working women as leaders I also have no problem. Over my career I've had a lot of female superiors and I have not had any problems. It's not the gender it's the mindset. Do you really have to have a dick to be superior? June Dally-Watkins where are you?

DOMESTIC BLISS-TERS?

Like father like son and like mother like daughter rings all too true. Our natural instinct is to follow what we have seen before, this is why boys who beat up on women have usually seen other men beat up on women, predominantly common law partners and step-parents, who incidentally are also the predominant kiddy-fiddlers. The latest fashionable bru-ha-ha centers around domestic violence but as usual it is a knee jerk reaction to an age old problem. It seems that the media is always looking for a new hobby horse to blow out of proportion. Unfortunately due to a whole host of circumstances from financial to emotional it's hard for men and women to escape from domestic violence within the family home.

Rather than continue to publicise the problem the media should be putting pressure on authorities  to make ways for victims to remove themselves from the situation and be counselled or at least have perpetrators face harsh non-custodial sentences. 

Naturally the experts blame everything else for the problem and not genetic pre-disposition and parental example. Alcohol and drugs are always at the center of blame, but they are not, they are the triggers, they set off the brains desire to knock seven days out of anyone who argues with them. Plates hurl themselves against walls, fists accidentally hit faces and knives sometimes carve up more than a slice of bread its all a very spiritual experience, the spirit of evil within some of us.

But violence doesn’t always stay at home, bullying doesn’t always stay in the playground. It spills out into the general community and if we see it and do nothing we may as well just go over their and join in. I’m not advocating violence, in reality I have great difficulty even setting traps for invading mice, in probability don’t even carry the violence gene and I’m not alone. So if you see violence, even verbal don’t stand back and think this is none of my business, let them know you know and you want their vile behavior to stop.

Another argument may suggest that Social Media and the resultant lack of face-to-face contact, hence distance and untouchability, prevents face-to-face positive socialising but that is more about the definiton of bullying not why it exists.

IN REMEMBERANCE

We are all inexplicably proud of the place where we were born, even those of us who were not born and raised in Linton. We support the local football, netball, cricket and eight ball competitions, we gather together on Linton Day for Australia Day and celebrate what has been. I have a problem at the moment trying to create a list of the things that we can be proud of today and into our future.

We had an international reputation for integrity and fairness, politeness and mate ship, and a proud tradition of protecting our country by shooting people we were told we didn’t like. We have apologised to aboriginals for invading Botany Bay and making them virtual slaves, from deliberately attempting semi-genocide, although we just called it ‘breeding them out’. We have had to apologise to children stolen from their Mothers because Mummy shouldn’t have become a Mummy in the first place. We had to apologise to this stolen generation of black and white children for the emotional, physical and sexual abuse carried out by our Carers, Warders, Superintendents and Matrons, not just the Reverend this and Father that.

Can we be proud of a Prime Minister who spends more time on the phone to the American Ambassador than to the Farmers Federation. We have to thank America too for allowing us to be invaded by boat people from countries they have invaded or destabilised for the benefit of their arms manufacturing industry. It’s obvious that Detroit was not a center for bullet making. We must thank our Prime Minister for emptying our pockets to provide gas to Asia whilst crying out about moratoriums on CSG because our domestic gas reserves beginning to run on empty. Cooks in Tokyo pay less for our gas than we do. We can be proud that we ship 5 billion cubic meters of LPG a year to China but can’t provide for our own domestic or industrial needs along with our cars for less than four times the international selling price.

Then of course our armed services. Fifty years ago we had a strong force located all around the country that enabled young men to be recruited from every state. Now we are struggling to maintain and Army that needs only two or three Generals, a Navy that can only man three out of four of our ships, and an Air Force that has ordered more aircraft than we have pilots to fly them. Mathematically we have spent more on toys for the boys than the boys that have to play with them. Who makes them to sell to us?

Our servicemen are going down like flies to PTSD due to multiple deployments to countries where we don’t even know who the enemy is. Where as many of our soldiers are killed by the people they are defending as those we are fighting against.

And what about our industry, our ability to be self-sufficient, to feed ourselves, to clothe ourselves and employ ourselves. What we have we export, what we need we import, it’s called ‘trade’. We grow a tomato and send it to India and then we can buy a tomato that we imported from Thailand, we grow a Banana to sell to Japan and then import a Banana from Barbados to feed ourselves. It’s called ‘stupidity’? We pull out fruit trees in the Goulburn Valley so as not to create a bio-hazard situation that might occur if we stopped importing food irrigated with sewerage from China.

We should apologise as well to our Farmers who these days may be better off if they were to go to Afghanistan where our government is subsidising the Heroin trade as a viable alternative to growing food.

We have cried out for investment in our growth industries from foreign sources while our superannuation funds are invested in the New York Stock Exchange and sucked out of us by the GFC. But maybe its our fault for being too greedy and wanting too much in too short a time that we might be better off blowing it all at Crown Casino, at least it would stay in an Australians pocket and not a quasi-American called Rupert.

Where is our pride in industry? Where are the factories that used to melt things, make things, bend things, stamp things and put things together. Where are the skilled tradesmen that could paint things and mend things, drive things and demolish things. Our new throw-away world doesn’t need them. Where are the Metters and BHP Steel, the car industry and the shipping industry, where has Crown-Corning gone, Grace Brothers and Scarf’s, Nutt and Muddle, Resche’s or even our film industry.

Of course trade is important to us, we still grow more than we can eat, still dig up more minerals than we can smelt, still sell natural gas that we apparently don’t want, and still dispose of more coal than we can burn for electricity. That is all good? We need to trade, to get rid of what we have too much of and to buy in what we don’t have enough of, but trade for trades sake, profit for profits sake is not the way to a secure independent future for our country. Our government doesn’t even want the tax that trade should be paying, its apparently easier to rip off citizens they don’t know than companies that contribute to their election funds.

But we are a proud nation. Proud to prevent too many religious symbols appearing on TV outside religious programs, proud to have 13 percent of our prison population holding foreign passports, proud to allow foreigners to own great swathes of our media, our farms, our wheat export facilities, our water supplies, our gas reserves, our mines, our shops, the few makers of things and worst of all foreign ownership of what we eat. We are not the food bowl of Asia, we are Asia’s cash cow, America’s supplicant and Britain’s estranged relative.

What we can be proud of dear readers is being Australian in the first place. When you look at all the turmoil in the world, the bickering, the backstabbing, political corruption, religious tensions, and racial intolerance we can be proud that we at least don’t have the turmoil. We are too complacent to do ‘turmoil’’. Bickering, backstabbing and intolerance, well, that’s normal isn’t it.

This Australia Day lets just ensure we all turn up for the CFA’s Breakfast confident in the fact that we have yet again elected a government that couldn’t give a toss about us but still will not leave us alone. Lets be proud to be Australian, to be tolerant of Golden pains Council, to look up to the Premier of Victoria and happy that we voted in a Prime Minister just as bad as the last few. The more things change in Australia the more things stay the same in Australia and I for one salute our stability through complacency.

HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY

IT WAS THE KRAUTS

There is an explanation for the present Christmas tree and its present use in the Australian Christmas.

In Europe also, about 1,200 years ago, an English missionary named Winfrid (Saint Boniface) was traveling in northern Germany. To the east of Dusseldorf, in Geismar forest, he came across a group of heathens who were preparing to sacrifice Prince Asulf at an oak tree, a symbol of the god Thor.

Winfrid stopped the sacrifice, cut down the oak and in its place a young fir tree appeared. Winfrid said this fir should be revered as the Tree of Life a symbol of Christ. In the later Middle Ages, fir trees were used in church mystery plays to represent the Tree of Life. But other than that, cutting down trees and bringing them inside as decoration was not seen in Christian homes until relatively recently. The first record of the Christmas tree was in 1605 at Strasburg, and in 1840 introduced by Princess Helena of Mecklenburg into France and by the Prince Consort to England. How did this become a custom of modern man?

Once upon a time thee was a bit of biffo going on between two cousins, the King of England and the Kaiser of Germany of Germany. Instead of just duking it out in the lounge room of one of their palaces they decided to let sixty million other people do away with themselves first and called it a Great War. To tell the truth there was nothing great about it at all, but I digress as usual.

Such trees were decorated with one or more apples, representing the forbidden fruit which we are also forbidden from eating. Today we decorate our trees with similar shiny red balls made of thin glass or plastic and many different shapes and sizes as well, and still not allowed to be eaten.

The Christmas tree therefore refers to Bibble metaphors teaching us to not succumb to sin. Nothing Pagan about it at all. To be on the safe side however, the tree should not be brought into the home and decorated before Christmas Eve, otherwise bad luck will befall the home and a lot of money wouldn't be made by profiteers. It is these superstitions are more likely believed if we include here and there old fashioned words like 'befall'. The Christmas Tree must be taken down and removed from the house before the Bells of Midnight on New Years Eve, otherwise you will have to wait until the twelfth night and burn it to chase away any mischievous spirits. Maybe it might be better not to have a tree at all so you won't have to chase those spirits away but you can just drink them with the money you saved.

Christmas is enjoyed by people all over the world regardless of race, gender or religious beliefs and there's no need for you to be upset over the ignorance of others. Jesus was born in the humblest of settings; indeed his whole life showed us the importance of humility. He taught us not to be judgmental. He taught us how to love.

So enjoy Christmas, wherever you are, whoever you are and whatever your beliefs.

DOES TRAVEL REALLY BROADEN THE MIND?

Was this a true statement or just another whimsical philosophical stupidity as 'How long is a piece of string?'

Maybe in the days of the Grand Tour a few centuries ago when cultures even a few hundred miles away were so radically different to yours travel did broaden the mind, but today when Western civilisation begins breeding a boring sameness should we spend money on traveling anywhere.

Up, up and away on a big monoplane, thousands of dollars just for a seat to sit on. The hassle of security at both ends, I had to remove my pants belt at Avalon and I'm still holding my bag in one hand and my trousers up with the other.

So you land in another country, as strange as New Zealand or as dangerous as Puckapunyal and even before you get out of the airport you are assailed by the sights of Mc. Donalds, KFC and Subway. Why?

Why do we need to eat a Big Mac in Abu Dhabi, a deep fried chicken leg steeped in a host of secret herbs and spices in Bangladesh? For that matter does a Zimbabwean Sandwich Artist decorate your roll in Subway any different to those in Ballarat? I don't think so.

Then of course there is the accommodation. An Acor Hotel in Madrid is run the same, looks the same, is serviced the same and has the same beds and coffee as your Acor room in Nambour. The staff are just as friendly and inefficient and all have the same inability to speak English.

Today in a world of electronic wizardry including big screen 3D television (which is still trying to take off) why could we not just save thousands of dollars, hundreds of hours of differing opinion and the constant whine of 'whatever' in our ears can we not just stay where we are, or maybe travel as far as Bendigo, and make believe we are really somewhere both exotic and erotic of which Bendigo is certainly not, with the exception of the Chinese Temple.

'Hell Yes' I scream and by doing so save at least $50 in tips, whether that be in Drachma or in Dong.

So here we go on our latest overseas adventure. Pack the car with all the non-essentials of travel and drive off into the sunrise, a smile on our faces and an unpaid booking for 'Treasure Island' in the glove box. We are off to broaden our mind, experience the exhilaration of the wind in our hair, let the kids imagine they are flying with the Red Baron for five silent minutes and then Eye Spy for two bickering hours. Who f........ cares if Yew Tree doesn't start with an E.

No lectures about seat belts or placing our table in an upright position. Not having to watch someone mime how to blow a whistle, and no mention of how you don't blow up your floaties until you land in the water outside the aircraft. Why this is needed on a flight between Griffith and Dubbo is really open to debate.

On arrival at Shangri-Low because Treasure Island went bust due to them failing to install 3D television, one alights to the merry greeting of 'G'Day' instead of a polite shrug to indicate they can't understand a word you say.

Find the remote for the Travel Simulator, a big screen 3D TV outside the balcony, which instantly throws up the sights and sounds but not the smells of Calcutta and start unpacking the bags. The kids get onto 'Wigglespace' on the internet which will keep them amused for the week and the parents retreat to the bar to get pissed just like at home.

No hassles in crowded shops where pushing and shoving has been elevated to a high art, no stupid mime act to ask someone where the bus stop is, and the same room service that brings the same Kiddy Meal as they had a week ago at home. What makes the trip all the more exciting is the room service person who gives a polite shrug to indicate they didn't understand a word you said.

Oh! Linton ..... you're missing nothing except the Squatting Ewe Car Wash..

For those who live in L.I.S.A (Less Intelligent States of America)