IN REMEMBERANCE

We are all inexplicably proud of the place where we were born, even those of us who were not born and raised in Linton. We support the local football, netball, cricket and eight ball competitions, we gather together on Linton Day for Australia Day and celebrate what has been. I have a problem at the moment trying to create a list of the things that we can be proud of today and into our future.

We had an international reputation for integrity and fairness, politeness and mate ship, and a proud tradition of protecting our country by shooting people we were told we didn’t like. We have apologised to aboriginals for invading Botany Bay and making them virtual slaves, from deliberately attempting semi-genocide, although we just called it ‘breeding them out’. We have had to apologise to children stolen from their Mothers because Mummy shouldn’t have become a Mummy in the first place. We had to apologise to this stolen generation of black and white children for the emotional, physical and sexual abuse carried out by our Carers, Warders, Superintendents and Matrons, not just the Reverend this and Father that.

Can we be proud of a Prime Minister who spends more time on the phone to the American Ambassador than to the Farmers Federation. We have to thank America too for allowing us to be invaded by boat people from countries they have invaded or destabilised for the benefit of their arms manufacturing industry. It’s obvious that Detroit was not a center for bullet making. We must thank our Prime Minister for emptying our pockets to provide gas to Asia whilst crying out about moratoriums on CSG because our domestic gas reserves beginning to run on empty. Cooks in Tokyo pay less for our gas than we do. We can be proud that we ship 5 billion cubic meters of LPG a year to China but can’t provide for our own domestic or industrial needs along with our cars for less than four times the international selling price.

Then of course our armed services. Fifty years ago we had a strong force located all around the country that enabled young men to be recruited from every state. Now we are struggling to maintain and Army that needs only two or three Generals, a Navy that can only man three out of four of our ships, and an Air Force that has ordered more aircraft than we have pilots to fly them. Mathematically we have spent more on toys for the boys than the boys that have to play with them. Who makes them to sell to us?

Our servicemen are going down like flies to PTSD due to multiple deployments to countries where we don’t even know who the enemy is. Where as many of our soldiers are killed by the people they are defending as those we are fighting against.

And what about our industry, our ability to be self-sufficient, to feed ourselves, to clothe ourselves and employ ourselves. What we have we export, what we need we import, it’s called ‘trade’. We grow a tomato and send it to India and then we can buy a tomato that we imported from Thailand, we grow a Banana to sell to Japan and then import a Banana from Barbados to feed ourselves. It’s called ‘stupidity’? We pull out fruit trees in the Goulburn Valley so as not to create a bio-hazard situation that might occur if we stopped importing food irrigated with sewerage from China.

We should apologise as well to our Farmers who these days may be better off if they were to go to Afghanistan where our government is subsidising the Heroin trade as a viable alternative to growing food.

We have cried out for investment in our growth industries from foreign sources while our superannuation funds are invested in the New York Stock Exchange and sucked out of us by the GFC. But maybe its our fault for being too greedy and wanting too much in too short a time that we might be better off blowing it all at Crown Casino, at least it would stay in an Australians pocket and not a quasi-American called Rupert.

Where is our pride in industry? Where are the factories that used to melt things, make things, bend things, stamp things and put things together. Where are the skilled tradesmen that could paint things and mend things, drive things and demolish things. Our new throw-away world doesn’t need them. Where are the Metters and BHP Steel, the car industry and the shipping industry, where has Crown-Corning gone, Grace Brothers and Scarf’s, Nutt and Muddle, Resche’s or even our film industry.

Of course trade is important to us, we still grow more than we can eat, still dig up more minerals than we can smelt, still sell natural gas that we apparently don’t want, and still dispose of more coal than we can burn for electricity. That is all good? We need to trade, to get rid of what we have too much of and to buy in what we don’t have enough of, but trade for trades sake, profit for profits sake is not the way to a secure independent future for our country. Our government doesn’t even want the tax that trade should be paying, its apparently easier to rip off citizens they don’t know than companies that contribute to their election funds.

But we are a proud nation. Proud to prevent too many religious symbols appearing on TV outside religious programs, proud to have 13 percent of our prison population holding foreign passports, proud to allow foreigners to own great swathes of our media, our farms, our wheat export facilities, our water supplies, our gas reserves, our mines, our shops, the few makers of things and worst of all foreign ownership of what we eat. We are not the food bowl of Asia, we are Asia’s cash cow, America’s supplicant and Britain’s estranged relative.

What we can be proud of dear readers is being Australian in the first place. When you look at all the turmoil in the world, the bickering, the backstabbing, political corruption, religious tensions, and racial intolerance we can be proud that we at least don’t have the turmoil. We are too complacent to do ‘turmoil’’. Bickering, backstabbing and intolerance, well, that’s normal isn’t it.

This Australia Day lets just ensure we all turn up for the CFA’s Breakfast confident in the fact that we have yet again elected a government that couldn’t give a toss about us but still will not leave us alone. Lets be proud to be Australian, to be tolerant of Golden pains Council, to look up to the Premier of Victoria and happy that we voted in a Prime Minister just as bad as the last few. The more things change in Australia the more things stay the same in Australia and I for one salute our stability through complacency.

HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY

IT AIN’T A-TRICKLIN’

Victoria, once the envy of the country, with the exception of those reprobates in NSW, has always been able to hold its own both nationally and internationally. Over the last twenty years however, since the BIG SALE VICTORIAN INFRASTRUCTURE, things have been going slowly downhill.

One could lay blame at many different feet, but the most fault has to be laid at the feet of the economists, the bean counters, the mathematicians who see nothing but numbers, noughts and crosses.

In this issue I would like to explore the processes involved in our Freeway System, not that we have one in Linton, that are critical pieces of infrastructure for the economy and the country as a whole.

In this first part I would to example to the two different freeway models the states use, and, from this one can see why Victoria’s road, despite the fact with almost the same population as NSW, it only has to provide half the road distances of most of the other less populous states.

In NSW AND Victoria a freeway overpass looks like this:-



There is a major problem in Victoria (right) when every kilometre or so three lanes of traffic are forced to merge down to two lanes, thus choking 1/3rd of the cars. This does not happen in NSW (left) where lanes do not merge and thus do not choke up.

In both instances there is a general merging after an overpass but that is to be expected and as cars merge at the same speeds there is no major congestion
.
In some areas however, when traffic builds up, Victoria has installed traffic lights to ON ramps as there is insufficient roadway for any traffic, at any speed, to merge safely. This seems to cancel out any idea that these are expressways. The very term ‘Express’ means no stopping.

Then we have the examples of the appalling tunnel system in Melbourne. In NSW and Victoria Tunnel entrances look like this:-

Of course there are a couple of exceptions to every rule. These are just my observations.

However NSW has not only provided emergency breakdown lanes inside many  tunnels but installed off-ramps which can be used as emergency slip roads if tunnels slow down or get blocked. Victoria, in general, has missed this point. Along with rarely installing slip roads, except kilometres before the tunnel, giving drivers little chance to divert, they rarely have breakdown lanes either. In the event of an accident, OHS insists on two lanes being closed. In some tunnels this blocks it completely, in others it creates road rage as three lanes try to merge down to one which produces bad tempers and road rage.

Many moons ago, Main Roads Departments in all states had a motto ‘What do we need now, double that and then double it again. That should take care of the next 50 years” Now it seems to be “What do we need, what have we got in our budget, how long till the next election”.

It is safe to say that “No government has ever brought anything in on time and on budget” regardless of all the excuses they trot out. Contracts are so complicated and convoluted that not even the people who write them can explain them. When 17 Public Servants all draw their piece of the puzzle in their own way in their own time, without ever getting together. Little wonder that private enterprise runs rings around government services. In development terms the private sector thinks like mature and logical adults while the Public Sector is still dumping in its nappy.

In the second part I would like to write about……………………..hold it a second

‘Hey you……
Yes you with the fucking hat on…….
Would you stop talking while this person tries to read this story.”

Where was I, oh yes, the Trickle Down Effect. It doesn’t just apply to rich bastards trickling their money down, about as true as the Domino Theory, to us poor bastards at the bottom.

No it applies to the tendering process when building our tunnels and freeways as well. It’s called capitalism, but in name only, the truth is capitalism died years ago and we just haven’t noticed.

When I worked for a government department examining prices and tenders I worked hand-in-hand with experienced Clerks of Works who knew what different jobs entailed and supervised those jobs as well. We were taught to operate on the ‘Goldilocks Principle’ for the prospective tenderer.
The quoted costs would be either too high, too low or just right.

If the cost was too high it meant that a hefty profit margin had been added to the bottom line either by inflating wages or overestimating materials. If the cost was too low it was an indication that the tenderer was either inexperienced, desperate for the work, or was shoddy and unreliable. If the quote was just right, which means it fell between the two or three other quotes it was a good indication that the price was about where it should be and put forward to head office as the successful or preferred tenderer for the arrangement of contracts.

The Trickle Down Effect generally applies these days to all major contracts.
Example: Each with profit margin of 10 percent.
Company One: Designs and tenders. $20 million
After profit $18 Million.
A Major Construction firm is engaged - to oversee the whole job.
After profit $ 16.2 Million
Hire company for construction equipment - After profit remainder $14.5 Million
Sub-contractors for various activities - $ 13.1 Million remains
Hire of safety barriers and notices - $11.8 Million left
Recruitment company for labourers - $10.6 Million with the balance left for purchase of materials and to cover all other other costs including worker insurance, wages and salaries, power and water, etc.
This might leave $ 9 million, less than half of the tender price, for the purchase of the actual building materials.

This trickle down effect was shown adequately when the Linton Replica Train Station was built. Over a period of time, with Golden Pains insisting that the project come in on time and on budget had to keep erasing bits and pieces of the plans until only about half of what was supposed to be stands there today. Funded with Commonwealth money there was no way the council was going to contribute anything to the project except for all the publicity that Council was providing us with this magnificent town gift.

It is an asset to the town, but when one takes into account the many stupid errors during the process, like insisting there was no water there when there actually was water available.

Thanks for staying quiet while this was read.

FREEWAY, TOLLWAY AND EXPRESSWAY

What does these words mean? My Larousse Dictionary describes Freeway as a noun meaning ‘a toll free expressway’ and a Tollway as a noun meaning ‘‘a fee may be charged to use the expressway’. What I still don’’t understand is that in reality both are one in the same, the only difference is that on a Tollway to have to pay to get f…… about. When I look up the term Expressway it becomes very clear being described as a wide divided road which has several lanes and limited access, and which crosses other roads at a different level, for ‘high speed’ through traffic. Someone should write to the compilers of dictionaries to point out the gross error in their definitions. And to correct them immediately.

On a trip to Melbourne recently using both types of expressway I found no difference between government built monstrosities from which serving politicians derive their income and the private road from which retired politicians derive their income and both road systems are controlled by the ’Mysterious Reasons Agency’.

The MRA is like Homeland Security. A non-cooperative group of different government departments and private agencies tasked with thwarting terrorism by making it impossible to deliver any form of device, be it car, truck, trailer or second-hand bomb from one side of the city to the other. Of course this means that sometimes there is collateral damage manifested in unintended circumstances which also prevent everyone else from crossing from one side of the city to the other.

The various agencies involved use ten differing methods to achieve their aims.

The steeple-chasers, those employees whose job it is to erect as many barriers as possible for other workers to stand behind and then retire to a shed for the day to watch SBS soccer.

Members of the Lollypop League whose job it seems is to jump out in front of cars vigorously waving red and yellow ‘slow’ signs and then violently spin it to ‘stop’’ the moment you are two metres away from them. If you are quick enough the lollypop will not get tangled up in your windscreen wipers, if not you will be faced with a rather ugly mug flattened against your windscreen glass.

The Driver with the epileptic foot that alternates between 5 and 60 km/hr because the speed sign said 40. Sitting behind one of these drivers is like being assaulted by red strobe lights that inevitably mean that anyone who suffers from real epilepsy is also about to start disco dancing in their car.

The ‘Gamers’ who, with a Controller in their hand, create havoc changing the electronic speed signs. Over a ten kilometres stretch they can make twenty changes to the speed signs for no apparent reason except to play with your mind.

The overhead electronic gantries designed to flash messages from the Traffic Mess Centre somewhere in downtown St.Kilda. By watching streaming videos from various observation points they can direct the signs to make all manner of statements that may or may not actually be true. ‘Slow down traffic hazard ahead’ and ‘prepare yee the way to change lanes at any moment’ are two of the more popular messages, but the most annoying is the ‘‘prepare to stop ahead’ when you have been sitting motionless for 15 minutes.

The motorway gantries to indicate your speed that either do not work or inexplicably measure the car speed in the lane beside you.

This combination of events will then so confuse you that you have no idea what speed you are supposed to be driving at just in time to have your photo taken and speed recorded at the ‘safety camera’ installed on yet another overhead gantry. I’’m not sure of the correct figures but probably $15 million may have been collected last year just from these camera alone, but then we see that it cost $16 million to install and monitor them over the same period. This loss is then made up by collections from Parking Metres and that is less than what Gina Reinhardt pays in tax. I told you it was all mysterious didn’t I? There is no evidence being presented that prove that speed cameras have saved a single life and plenty of evidence to say they haven’t.

What about the fictional signs ? Dan Brown could write another Da Vinci Code trying to explain why speed warning signs force you to slow down to 40 only to find the only thing happening was you slowing down to 40, or the ‘Work on Side Road’ when you can’t even find a side road.

I would just love to be given some super power to be able to deal with the moron who blocks off three of the four lanes available, at a point where you have no escape route, so that one bloke can dig a hole in the verge or mow the median strip with a hand mower.

There seems to be a belief in the MRA that slow speeds save lives when in fact they don’t. Lives are lost through frustration over the drivers employed to slow you down by deliberately travelling 20Km under the speed limit.

A good cure for all of these problems, and a sure-fire way to make expressways do what they are supposed to be doing would be to employ demobbed SAS, fresh back from Afghanistan, to perch themselves on the overhead gantries with the aim of taking out any terrorist not obeying the rules of the road. I would start by positioning a couple of snipers just before the Westgate Bridge to prevent anyone from blocking any lane for any reason that would impede the flow of traffic whether they be a driver, steeple-chaser, lollypop person or the bloke that takes the film out of the speed (sorry ‘safety’) cameras. A quick simple solution to most of the problems preventing expressways from expressing.

TEN THOUSAND REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF

Readers of the Astonisher may not always understand the twisted logic of it’s editorial staff and can, have been and are sometimes left scratching their heads as to W.T.F is going on.

We recently received, from the State Revenue Office, a cheque for $10,000. After dancing around the banking chamber to deposit my windfall it struck me as to the unfairness of the entire scheme, my anger being increased when reading that most of the money goes to the builders and developers and not to those who should receive the grant.

I bought a second-hand house for $35,000 and had it relocated on to my block. For that I received $10,000 back from the First Home Owners Grant. At the very least I thought I would get a pro-rata amount and would have been happy with half that amount, but no, the grant was the same whether your house cost you $50,000 or $500,000. Almost a third of what I paid for the building?

How this works is beyond comprehension. I buy a house already built and move it. Then to me that is a second-hand house. Fortunately I knew a change in the scheme was coming so thought I was being clever by having the contracts suitably dated so a second-hand dwelling was still eligible for a grant. But, dear folks, a second-hand house moved on to a block is a NEW house. It was not even the first house as I already occupied a dwelling on this same block this was, to my mind, a second-second hand house but it still qualified as a NEW build. Apparently as this was the first grant I had applied for, even though technically I was already a home owner, it was still a NEW home on a NEW block from a NEW owner. This does not compute.

Now at 70+ and on the downward slide to a hole in the ground I could well afford not to be given such an indulgence from the state especially when the very people who need it, young first home owners do not qualify for this largesse unless it is on a new build on a new block and they have never owned a place before. How many young people, couples, newlyweds and young parents would be better off under the old scheme where it was for any new ownership, but no it has to be a new construction, so the idea of young people buying a cheap pre-owned house and working their way up the real estate ladder is just not an option. It’s new houses or nothing.

That’s what makes me angry, an old can’t like me gets the money, a young person starting out doesn’t and who benefits but the developers, real estate agents, builders and investors in new houses and not the people it should go to - the young.

Now you know why builders offer generous Cash-back schemes, it’s not theirs, it’s yours, stolen from you by builders whose hands are polishing the balls of the politicians. They just bullshit you into thinking it’s a FREE bonus from a generous construction conglomerate.

Having said that despite my anger I’m not going to give it back.

POLITICIANS OR POCKET LINERS?

It is well known that Big Business and Government Departments are really those who govern us. It is not government by the people for the people. We don’t decide who we want to represent us. We are told who to vote for by the political parties because it is parties we elect not people. If we voted for competent intelligent individuals we would not have half the morons in Government that we have.

I think it was in the movie ‘Planes, Trains and Automobiles’ where I heard the quote. “I’m not a thief, I’m a lawyer. They’re similar professions anyway”.

What goes on behind closed doors we may never know and what is said over a gin and tonic at the Melbourne Club we are not privy to, but it does make one wonder why politicians with a particular interest always end up retiring (before being voted out of office) into very well-paid positions that do not require too much energy or thought. It’s Mates Rates in a different form. It’s lovely to be able to massage yourself into a future job but it should not be at the expense of the taxpayer. How can politicians complain about the megabucks made by the private sector when they vote megabucks for themselves?

Politicians all employ spin-doctors, they use all the hype of private sector advertising even to the point of blatant misrepresentation. They can’t say what they honestly feel else they may upset the Party Leader. However, sometimes things go wrong. Some party functionaries have been a little careless and ended up behind the bars they thought everyone else should be behind. Some have felt themselves beyond normal morals, like some sports personalities, and have maybe fumbled with something they shouldn’t have, others seek out all manner of means to enhance their financial assets.

Most politicians end up corrupted either morally, politically or financially. There has been over a century of shenanigans inside the walls of government and big business which we ordinary Joe’s or Jane’s will never be able to penetrate or expose. Recent polls in regard to what professions people respect Doctors and Teachers were inexplicably at the top but more telling are the bottom three ‘Real Estate Salesmen, Radio Shock-jocks and Politicians.

With elections coming up in September we have our chance to put the politicians in their place. Make sure that you discover and understand the policies of each party before you tick any boxes.

Has Labor gone totally to the centre of politics and forgotten whom they are supposed to represent, have the market economists taken total control of the Liberals, do the Nationals really represent the country voter any more or are they just the coat-tails of the Coalition?

Will Katter and Palmer take votes away from the far right of the Coalition and make it harder for Nationals to be elected? Will the Greens benefit from the left wing voter leaving the Labor Party box blank?

Our feeling is that there are so many parties vying for the conservative vote that they could jeopardize a clear victory for the Liberals and give us an unruly Senate of inexperienced do-gooders.

I don’t know about you dear reader but the term ‘Junkyard Dog’ seems to be appropriate to describe some of our politicians. After apologizing to all dogs I think I’ll go and have a root on the Astonishers credit card.

Maddas Alhell

Addendum:

Recently ABC Four Corners did an expose about the collapse of Prime Investments (to invest in Nursing Homes). Dr. Peter Wooldridge the ex-Minister for Health in Liberal Governments was on the Board of Directors when it collapsed after $140 million of the $500 million put in by investors was distributed to the Board and the C.E.O including a staggering $32 million fee just to list itself on the Stock Exchange. Honest politicians?

This same Peter Wooldridge also approved Medicare Rebates (For US readers this means TAX FREE) for MIR Scanners in Private Clinics and Hospitals but not the Public Health Sector. As a result private patients get scans for nothing while public patients (taxpayer funded) have to pay around $240.00 for the same privilege. Handing government money straight to the private sector or looking after your mates?

SMOKE AND MIRRORS NO LONGER CONFINED TO MAGICIANS

Duty, Levy, Toll, Tariff, Excise, Charge, Fine and Rates are all the variations used to circumvent the use of the word Tax. The only upfront use of it is when it is combined with Goods, Services, Income and Payroll. I’m not sure what they call the motza derived from the dozens of forms of legal gambling that they pretend to rail against.

I believe that it is time that all levels of government fully disclose before every election how they intend to raise government funds, in what amounts and where they intend to spend it and how many people they will need to spend it. No longer should we have to put up with the smoke and mirrors of what they will spend over the next four years. Like the banks it screens the real income and expenditures from scrutiny.

Each year they announce a four-year spending plan which is the same money they announced three years ago. Four years is also the distance between elections which gives them the chance to announce another expense over four years which will never be spent because it doesn’t exist, it was called something else the year before.

The Stimulus Package was the same. A Billion Dollars promised by the Federal Government to build Public Facilities just happened to be the same Billion Dollars that the State Governments promise to build Public Facilities and the same Billion Dollars that the Local Councils claimed they were going to spend on Public Facilities. Nobody knows whose money they are spending and that’s just how they like it.

To put in a Carbon Tax as an excuse for us to cut the country's carbon emissions while at the same time scrap subsidies which allow ordinary people to cut their own carbon emissions is just another way we are being hood-winked out of our money by rapacious politicians and public servants bent on moving public money into corpoarte supporters pockets.

It's about time we got off our fat behinds, me included, and started to take back control of our own country. Now where did I put that bloody speed camera ticket?

GOVERNMENTS CANNOT MAKE MISTAKES

It is impossible for Governments to make mistakes. That is an awful truth that even they will admit.

I would be a strong supporter of any political party that stands up and admits their mistakes. I would be an even stronger supporter of any politician or party that includes in any Act of Parliament a clause which allows anyone damaged by a law (thereby admitting fault). The Government cannot be sued. Therefore the Stolen Generation, the woefully abused Children in State Care (which still occurs), the Children denied an adequate education because of some smart-arsed theorists who think they know what’s best for children but only manage to succeed in stuffing up the system. The children denied adequate and accessible medical attention in remote rural areas (both black and white).

Where are the paedophiles now that used to be employed at the State Children’s Homes (Mittagong as an example) when they were closed down. The excuse was a matter of economics the truth was more like they were so riddled with child-abusers at every level that they were closed and the abusers shuffled off to some other department away from children. All in the name of ‘the government does not make mistakes’. The only thing the government has admitted is that their care workers fuck children but deny it still goes on.

On a lighter note - Did you know that the highly publicised dog restraints in cars act was quietly rescinded recently because it contravened the ‘Cruelty To Animals Act’. Goes to show lots of fanfare to bring something in and nothing said when it goes out. .

But get ready to still be pulled over. It is against the law for dogs to have their nose out the window (the same as your arm or elbow). Now I’m no lawyer but I believe this is a blatant act of discrimination agains dogs with long noses. Anyone want to start a class action on behalf of everything from Whippets and up?

Of course it could be worse. We could live in America.

WHEN THE WHOLE TOWN GOES TO SCHOOL

It is very rare that the Astonisher goes anywhere near politics, but as our local newspaper doesn't cover any local news except contributions from other groups and unedited press releases it Is up to us to fill the towns information void. This year 322 people voted in Linton down from 350 in the last election. Does this reflect the electoral boundary change or a few more casting their vote by post or as absentee in other booths? That is something we will probably never know.

First we have to have illustrations of the figures for those who prefer charts and cartoons. Despite the fact there was a significant change to the electoral boundaries the village of Linton does not appear to have shifted its preferred candidates as much as one might have expected.

According to just the Linton Booth at the school, the variations between parties were very small, the most significant change being the large group of 34 Linton voters swinging away from Ben Taylor (Liberals) and even 8 away from Geoff Howard (Labor). We believe this shows a total dislike of the two main parties and a swing to minor/micro parties.

New candidate Sonia Smith (Nationals) gained a little with 3 Linton voters moving her way, and despite the advice to her from our political correspondent, that the Nationals should 'go it alone with country-centric policies', they are getting very little out of their sleeping arrangements with the Liberals. She spent a lot of her time in the area, the only candidate that we know of, lobbying and trying to present herself as a minor rebel in the National ranks. It didn't work, despite lots of country perfume she was unable to overcome the metropolitan stench making the voters hold their nose.

The Greens seemed to have benefited from Linton wanting a new aroma picking up 11 more votes and going by their win in Melbourne CBD, populated apparently by Vegan Cyclists, could be a force to be reckoned with if they can convince country people that they are not just tree huggers. They could do that by aligning themselves closer to the Ford/Toyota Farmers than the Yodelling Hikers who freak out when their Range Rovers pick up a bit of mud.

What the results show is that there is still the same 20 people who stroll up to the school with no intention of doing any more than buying cakes rather than exercise their democratic right to put numbers in boxes. If you don't vote or are too stupid to know how to vote then you have no right to whinge and carry on about what our government is doing. We believe it’s a case of vote or shut up.

ABOLISH THE PARTY SYSTEM?

One place where one learns all the tricks of the trade, how to outgun your opponent, sidestep his strategy and demolish his defence is to work with a left of centre law firm like Slater and Gordon. Of course left of centre is where all potential antagonists gather, so if you want to piss off the establishment left of centre is a potentially a lucrative position to argue from. One very successful graduate of Slater and Gordon was our ex-Prime Minister Julia Gillard, but some would argue that she is not really someone S&G would be pleased to promote.

Julia, having learnt all about manipulation of intangible knowledge, through various cases involving both big business and politics, was in an ideal position to outgun, sidestep and demolish anything or anyone that stood in her way. She is a master at political strategy, constantly threatening her supposedly supportive colleagues into doing what she wants and not what the country needs. In the end the knife she was wielding was turned against her and with all the aplomb of a vanquished leader left politics altogether, but, not without a nice prime-ministerial pension to sustain her. Now of course she will be passing her vitreolic message to the dumbo’s studying law in Adelaide.

I always thought that the Liberals were the masters of ideological pile-driving, where the ideals of the party bulldozed away any ideals for Australia. But apparently Julia duplicated some of these strategies of the Liberals as Tony had begun to realise that the politics of fear, as practised by One Nation, could be just as useful to the Liberal cause. It is also this ‘fear-mongering’ that keeps the National Party compliant. All three major parties Liberal, Labor and National have really moved to the centre so that voters are confused over which policy really belongs to which party, and the three minor parties decided that one would go to the left (Green) one would go to the right (KAP) and one would move away from the Catholic Church (DLP). We don’t consider Palmer (P.U.P) as going in any direction.

Lets face it a party that represents only a proportion of the electorate is doomed to oblivion and the Nationals unfortunately appear to be taking that path. They are moving, like Labor, away from their heartland, and unless they revert back to the founding principals will find themselves caste out like lepers from their country colonies.

On another note this scribe, who has always been an admirer of anything so far to the left that I’m nearly always outside the common room, and probably the only true socialist in Linton. This is not to be confused with Communism as invented by Joseph Stalin. who like religion was high-jacked by the power hungry mongrel intent on enriching only himself, Stalin did do one good thing. He established that the representatives of the people and the employees of the people government would only have to obey one rule. Rule # 1. Always please the boss. I suppose in an Australian context Julia also adopted this all encompassing rule.

The party system is broken. We have gone the way of the United States and allow self-interest to dictate the countries direction. America admits its system is broken, and like Australia, is being run by chance, luck, happenstance and the everlasting incompetence of the bureaucrats. If we know the U.S system is broken and can’t be fixed unless by the hand of God, then why do we slavishly keep following the U.S and not govern in the interest of Australia and our neighbours rather than some sand-locked god-forsaken corrupt and religious divided backwater that no sensible person would even fly over let alone visit.

Lets get rid of political parties. The only parties to legally exist shall be where we can dance and be happy and get off our faces. It won’t be the chaos that some predict, nor shall the nation become ungovernable (politicians don’t govern) the state won’t collapse, although States should.

When a Private Members Bill comes up, as they do now from independents, all the other members of the house either agree or disagree with it, not on party lines but on what they believe their electorate would want and would be advantaged by. Groups of similar minds would band together to adopt, amend or defeat the law or policy. Nobody would be standing over our representatives,

Parliamentary Secretaries, Ministers and Prime Ministers would be elected by the both houses as with one example put forth by Republicans for the selection of a President/Governor General. The best woman or man would be elected to the most appropriate positions and the one most suited to their talents. There would be no free for-alls but mini-elections within parliament itself.

The beauty of this system is that the electors, you and I, would be voting for somebody we potentially know, somebody we believe has our interest at heart and somebody, if they don’t represent us that can be easily removed from office. The thing that keeps a politician on his toes is the next election.

ABOLISH THE PARTY SYSTEM?

ne place where one learns all the tricks of the trade, how to outgun your opponent, sidestep his strategy and demolish his defence is to work with a left of centre law firm like Slater and Gordon. Of course left of centre is where all potential antagonists gather, so if you want to piss off the establishment left of centre is a potentially a lucrative position to argue from. One very successful graduate of Slater and Gordon was our ex-Prime Minister Julia Gillard, but some would argue that she is not really someone S&G would be pleased to promote.

Julia, having learnt all about manipulation of intangible knowledge, through various cases involving both big business and politics, was in an ideal position to outgun, sidestep and demolish anything or anyone that stood in her way. She is a master at political strategy, constantly threatening her supposedly supportive colleagues into doing what she wants and not what the country needs. In the end the knife she was wielding was turned against her and with all the aplomb of a vanquished leader left politics altogether, but, not without a nice prime-ministerial pension to sustain her. Now of course she will be passing her vitriolic message to the dumbo’s studying law in Adelaide.

I always thought that the Liberals were the masters of ideological pile-driving, where the ideals of the party bulldozed away any ideals for Australia. But apparently Julia duplicated some of these strategies of the Liberals as Tony had begun to realise that the politics of fear, as practised by One Nation, could be just as useful to the Liberal cause. It is also this ‘fear-mongering’ that keeps the National Party compliant. All three major parties Liberal, Labor and National have really moved to the centre so that voters are confused over which policy really belongs to which party, and the three minor parties decided that one would go to the left (Green) one would go to the right (KAP) and one would move away from the Catholic Church (DLP). We don’t consider Palmer (P.U.P) as going in any direction.

Lets face it a party that represents only a proportion of the electorate is doomed to oblivion and the Nationals unfortunately appear to be taking that path. They are moving, like Labor, away from their heartland, and unless they revert back to the founding principals will find themselves caste out like lepers from their country colonies.

On another note this scribe, who has always been an admirer of anything so far to the left that I’m nearly always outside the common room, and probably the only true socialist in Linton. This is not to be confused with Communism as invented by Joseph Stalin. who like religion was high-jacked by the power hungry mongrel intent on enriching only himself, Stalin did do one good thing. He established that the representatives of the people and the employees of the people government would only have to obey one rule. Rule # 1. Always please the boss. I suppose in an Australian context Julia also adopted this all encompassing rule.

The party system is broken. We have gone the way of the United States and allow self-interest to dictate the countries direction. America admits its system is broken, and like Australia, is being run by chance, luck, happenstance and the everlasting incompetence of the bureaucrats. If we know the U.S system is broken and can’t be fixed unless by the hand of God, then why do we slavishly keep following the U.S and not govern in the interest of Australia and our neighbours rather than some sand-locked god-forsaken corrupt and religious divided backwater that no sensible person would even fly over let alone visit.

Lets get rid of political parties. The only parties to legally exist shall be where we can dance and be happy and get off our faces. It won’t be the chaos that some predict, nor shall the nation become ungovernable (politicians don’t govern) the state won’t collapse, although States should.

When a Private Members Bill comes up, as they do now from independents, all the other members of the house either agree or disagree with it, not on party lines but on what they believe their electorate would want and would be advantaged by. Groups of similar minds would band together to adopt, amend or defeat the law or policy. Nobody would be standing over our representatives,

Parliamentary Secretaries, Ministers and Prime Ministers would be elected by the both houses as with one example put forth by Republicans for the selection of a President/Governor General. The best woman or man would be elected to the most appropriate positions and the one most suited to their talents. There would be no free for-all but mini-elections within parliament itself.

The beauty of this system is that the electors, you and I, would be voting for somebody we potentially know, somebody we believe has our interest at heart and somebody, if they don’t represent us that can be easily removed from office. The thing that keeps a politician on his toes is the next election.

WANKERS ON WHEELS

Now don’t get me wrong folks some of my best friends are wankers and some of my friends ride pushbikes but I am quite proud of the fact that I hate the wankers-on-bikes that seem to work for the Department of Stupidity and want to make car drivers and the economy suffer.

The Victorian Government is in the throes of examining why we still keep killing ourselves and others with our cars. Like the fact that it is not guns that kill people let us say from the get go that speed is not the culprit either but the wanker holding the wheel.

People who drive for a living all agree that speed is not the main culprit. Many of them want speeds to actually increase. When there were no speed limits outside towns and cities we only had about double the number of deaths we have now.

Uh!? What did I just say? Yes. We have halved the death toll in Victoria in the last fourty years. That is an achievement. But its an achievement reached almost exclusively by better designed vehicles, ABS brakes, air-bags and seat belts, baby capsules and head rests and a whole raft of other vehicle improvements. I don’t know the figures nor can we find them out accurately but it appears to me that a great many deaths occur when rat-bags are exceeding the speed limit, not by 5 or 15 k/ph but by 50 and 60Km an hour. When young people kill themselves hitting trees at 160Km an hour it is a tragedy, sure, but can we say the accident was senseless when the cast and crew in the vehicle were probably egging each other on the go even faster around the next bend and, quite possibly, under the influence of materials in the next story..

What does slowing cars down do? It adds to the economic cost of running motor vehicles. When a motor vehicles optimum performance is around 100 K/ph what is the cost of 40K/ph past schools? It is especially galling when the limit applies half an hour before and after school. If schools allow children out earlier or later than the approved times then they should be held responsible for the safety of the child crossing the street. For Christ’s sake what would it cost and how much would the economy save by just putting enclosed overhead pedestrian crossings on all streets around the boundary of a school?

Let us hope that someone less stupid than those looking into this problem come up with sensible and realistic answers than just the age old problem solver of slowing down the traffic.

Violet Crumble

THE DEPARTMENT OF STUPIDITY

AND SO FOR THE OTHER RUBBISH

The Department of Stupidity is also alive and well in NSW.

The new Premier Barry O'Farrell has suggested that young people should have their Vehicle Learners Permit or P-Plates suspended for a mandatory period if caught spraying graffiti or other acts of vandalism.

His reasoning is that young men will do anything for their set of wheels. He's right to a degree but taking away P-Plates and such would only force them to continue breaking the law as we see countless times on those ghastly Reality Cop Shows. They will chance not getting caught and drive their cars anyway including not being registered or insured resulting in even more serious offences in an upward spiral.

Then of course one has to look at the other angles too. What happens if you don't have a car – will they take away their bus pass? ….. Who pays these stupid pricks to come up with these ideas? …...We do unfortunately - and far more than they are worth.